June 21, 2017 by Hope W.
As the rare few readers of my blog know, I haven’t been posting regularly for a long time, or even posted more than once every two months of late. I promise I’ve still been going to the movies regularly, so calling myself “The Regular Moviegoer” isn’t a misnomer — I just haven’t had the motivation to sit down and polish a post to my standards. I want every post that I publish to be as perfect as I can make it, and encompass as much of a subject as I can squeeze in, and that takes lots of time and effort. I am also probably one of the world’s laziest people with the willpower of a dead fish when left up to my own devices and no literal I-will-be-dead-if-I-don’t-churn-this-out-deadlines, and so, obviously, the end result is I don’t get anything done. What is it that the Bible says? “[T]he spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” (Matthew 26:41b) And I constantly get distracted by interesting articles and videos, and who wants to do things that are a drudge instead of- Oh look, shiny!
But I’ve been stuck in a rut lately, and I also feel myself becoming a more bitter, pessimistic person due to the current state of the world. I don’t want to delve too deep into the reasons, because I want this blog to be focused on movies instead of my political or religious views. (Maybe some day I’ll start another blog about those things, but let me first make sure I can maintain this blog regularly before I start thinking about other things.) But honestly, in my darkest moments, which I am having more of nowadays, I just wish that God will destroy the earth already. (a) That will teach us to abuse the earth that He created and graciously allowed us to live in, while indignantly denying that we are abusing the earth; and (b) human beings, without exceptions for any faith or race or nationality, can be such awful pieces of shit, who, despite what the world insists on telling us, really don’t deserve to live. Look in the comments sections on Facebook or anywhere else, especially on polarising issues, and you’ll find the cesspool of humanity. I don’t care if 13-year-olds or 70-year-olds wrote them — if the former, it’s just depressing that these people will grow up in the future to be the scum of society; if the latter, these people should really know better.
This is obviously a very unhealthy state of mind to be in. And so I am trying out some methods of shaking things up a little in my life. I read some articles today about people who committed to writing every day, even just 100 words a day, and felt themselves changed for it, and I decided to try it for myself. For one thing, it could improve my writing, which tends to be long and rambling and full of run-on sentences, and occasionally, devolve into downright gushing because I can’t contain myself. For another, it will help clear my mind a little and provide an outlet to vent, if only about things regarding the film industry. Yes, I do have a lot of things to say about the film industry. My colleague will attest to that.
Wish me luck! You’re welcome to join me too and see if this effects any change in your life. We can commiserate at the end of this experiment, which, barring all efforts of my willpower to be a limp fish, will last a year.