Instant reaction post: “Game of Thrones” S5, Ep9 ‘The Dance of Dragons’

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June 8, 2015 by Hope W.

Davos Seaworth and Shireen Baratheon

Davos Seaworth and Shireen Baratheon in ‘The Dance of Dragons’

Never go on Facebook the hours after Game of Thrones airs, if you haven’t seen it. Or any entertainment news website. Or even scroll past news headlines anywhere, because nobody even attempts to hide their spoilers anymore. All they have to do is post a damning picture with a “cryptic” headline that is as vague as people stripping off all their clothes and flashing their private bits, and you’ll be spoilt on the most important thing that happens in the episode, especially if it has been hinted at in previous episodes.

Take the awful death of Shireen (and by the way, I am writing this opening paragraph WITHOUT having seen the episode, OR read any recaps). Did I see it coming? Well, I *hoped* that Stannis’ better nature and fatherly love would prevent Melisandre’s scheme from being fulfilled, but obviously it didn’t. He isn’t worth rooting for anymore. Any father who allows his child to die in such a horrific manner deserves as horrible a death as he condemned his child to.

Now that’s out of the way, below are my reactions *while* watching the episode proper:

Why isn’t Melisandre cold?

So *that’s* Ramsay’s “20 men” plan. Apparently he can make smart moves that don’t involve torturing and flaying people! (Though horse torture is involved.)

For a moment there, Jon nearly had mutiny against his command.

Jon in 'The Dance of Dragons'

Jon in ‘The Dance of Dragons’

Stannis is sending Ser Davos away because he knew he would do anything to stop him from burning Shireen alive. As HE SHOULD.

Yes, say goodbye, Ser Davos. Deliver your doe to no one when you return. Read the rest of The Dance of Dragons yourself.

Hah! Jaime is expressing his fatherly disapproval at Myrcella’s skimpy clothing!

So the Sand Snakes aren’t as harmonious as we thought.

Thankfully Trystane’s revenge is just a petty punch to the face. I was thinking morbid thoughts about one of Bronn’s appendages being cut off.

Is that the first time we’ve seen Arya being propositioned? Shows how she’s grown!

Arya just blew her cover upon seeing Ser Meryn Trant!

Ser Meryn Trant is a pedophile! Is Arya going to be in trouble?

IS ARYA GOING TO SEDUCE SER MERYN TRANT IN ORDER TO CUT HIS THROAT? Horrible things will happen to you Arya if you go down that path! See what happened to your sister!

Surely A Man knows that Arya is lying!

Arya and A Man in 'The Dance of Dragons'

Arya and A Man in ‘The Dance of Dragons’

Poor Ellaria Sand. All she wanted to do was avenge her lover. I would love for her to be able to do so too, but she picked the wrong way to do it by targeting Myrcella, who had nothing to do with it.

Stannis, you didn’t have to choose. I don’t think it’s your destiny to be ruler, whatever you imagine.

Shireen! You don’t know what you’re signing up for! Stannis is not forgiven!

What makes you think burning her is going to stop you from starving? Will the “Lord of Light” suddenly rain food down from the heavens???

And suddenly, it’s Selyse Baratheon who grows a mother’s heart, after an entire series of having none, and Stannis who hardens his. I would say he had BETTER win the “Game of Thrones” after making such a monstrous sacrifice, except I no longer think he’s worthy of winning anything. I cannot imagine any other Thrones character who would commit such an abominable act of filicide, except maybe Joffrey or Ramsay, and we always knew those two were psychopaths. Stannis watched her burn to death alive! Her screams were heartwrenching!

Selyse Baratheon and Stannis, the WORLD'S WORST PARENTS

Selyse and Stannis Baratheon, the WORST PARENTS IN THE WORLD

And then we cut to a more festive scene.

Now that Ser Jorah actually has a good chance of dying, Daenerys regrets being so hard on him.

Whoa, where did all the Sons of the Harpy come from?! More importantly, why are they killing their own people?!

Hizdahr dies like that? What a fruitless power play Daenerys made!

Hizdahr zo Loraq and Daenerys in 'The Dance of Dragons'

Hizdahr zo Loraq and Daenerys in ‘The Dance of Dragons’

Daenerys finally accepts Ser Jorah back into the fold! But why did he touch her? :S He still has greyscale!

Oh no Daenerys is really in dire straits! And she is preparing to die!

The prodigal dragon returns!

And Daenerys gets up and flies away, leaving the rest of her people to die!

Next week, what will Ser Davos do when he returns and finds out that Stannis burnt his beloved princess to death? Will that finally be the straw that breaks his proverbial back and turns him against this madman?

“Shireen Baratheon” is trending on Yahoo!

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